Workshop led by Certified Trainer, Anna Haas with Trainer Candidate, Eivind Liland.
How is Love, Sex, and Dating Different When You're Honest?
“Truth in dating is not for the faint of heart” - Dr. Susan Campbell
Do you ever find yourself trapped in a cycle of pretense, repeating the same patterns, hitting the same barriers?
Desire for love, affection, touch and intimacy is at the core of our human existence. We all yearn to be accepted and wanted.
It's no surprise, then, that we often feel lost in the world of love, sex, and dating, and that we resort to pretense and avoidance. Often, we struggle with expressing our true desires, and go along with things that don't align with our inner truth.
In this workshop, we confront these challenges head-on. We'll practice articulating our fears and desires and find the right words to express what we truly want and need.
Have you ever…
Said yes when you wanted to say no?
Said no when you wanted to say yes?
Wondered how someone feels about you, but not dared to ask?
Had your feelings hurt but didn’t admit it?
Felt angry but acted like everything was fine?
Been jealous but acted cool?
Pretended to like someone more than you did?
Pretended to like someone less than you did?
Felt physically affectionate, but didn’t want to appear eager, easy or horny?
Felt appreciative, but held yourself back?
Pretended to be more turned on than you really were?
Had sex with someone to avoid conflict or confrontation?
Lied to protect someone’s feelings?
Felt nervous or inhibited with someone you’re especially attracted to?
Wished you would be more spontaneous and natural with someone you’re just getting to know?
Do you want to experience a more profound intimacy - one rooted in truth and authenticity?
If so, this residential retreat is for you!
Dates: 5th to 9th June 2024
The workshop starts on Wednesday with dinner at 6.30 p.m., and ends on Sunday with lunch at 1.00 p.m.
Contents
We will spend much of five days and four nights together, coming together as an honest community of our own. We will form a pact of truth-telling, agreeing to tell our truths for the duration of the retreat.
Activities include talks, directed conversations, paired exercises, small group exercises, meditation, movement and exercises in nonverbal communication, to help you learn how to relax into intimacy based on being open and honest.
The conversations will revolve around love, sex and dating. We will explore topics around communication of boundaries, relationship agreements and styles.
Drawing on the facilitators' ongoing and completed training in Radical Honesty, Sex- and Relationship Therapy, the Wheel of Consent by Betty Martin, and Getting Real and Truth in Dating by Dr. Susan Campbell, we will consider our cultural programming and facilitate a shift from controlling to relating. Through exercises, we will pay attention to our bodies, communicate boundaries and ask for what we want.
The retreat is designed to help you connect more deeply with yourself and with others by expressing fear, anger, appreciation and whatever else is arising in the moment. Inhonest interactions, the facilitators can assist you by:
Slowing down and placing the focus on one person’s experience at a time
Moving your attention to the here and to your body
Empathic reflection and exploration, offering suggestions to help discover what you feel and what you need, and finding the right words and ways to express yourself
Location and facilities
Join us this summer in ZEGG, the Center for Experimental Cultural Design.
This more than 30-year old living experiment, an hour from Berlin, has 120 people living and exploring the personal and cultural conditions for trust, connection and cooperation on a daily basis, with a particular focus on community, ecology, love and sexuality.
In the breaks, you may explore the community grounds and go for walks in the surrounding nature. Visit ZEGG’s village pub with delicious drinks, take a swim in the pool and enjoy the sun. We have booked the sauna for one evening, included in the price, with additional evenings available for booking as a group upon request.
The workshop takes place in the San Diego building located on the ZEGG community grounds.
Read more about the ZEGG community here (in German), and check out their festivals and events.
Meals and Accommodations
We will be served breakfast and two warm meals per day (vegetarian with vegan options), prepared from the community’s own permaculture acres and local organic sources.
The guest house has cozy single- and double rooms, as well as shared rooms if you like communal sleeping. You may also choose a tent or cabin, or to camp in your own tent.
Still not sure?
Honesty in Love, Sex and Dating is for you if you’re…
holding yourself back, scared of being too much, or not enough
paralyzed with fear of rejection
going along, instead of saying what you actually want
don’t actually know what you want
longing for feeling wanted and loved
scared of stepping over boundaries
struggling to express boundaries
struggling with the balance between autonomy and commitment
feeling almost too shy to talk about love, sex and dating, but would like to
longing for more depth and intimacy
pressuring yourself to be cool and sexy
pressuring yourself to be strong, brave and competent
want to please everyone and contact with other people often exhausts you
stress yourself out on dates and flirting and make an effort to do “the right thing”
Your sex life is boring and you’re holding back impulses, desires and fantasies
You’re afraid to be honest with your partner for fear of disappointing them
It is not for you if you…
don't want to tell the truth
want to stay in your comfort zone at all times
don't want to hear participants expressing themselves loudly at times
participate to change others in your life rather than yourself
Prices and Terms
The retreat price is €690, with an early-bird price of €520 if you order before the 5th May 2024.
In addition, there are costs for meals and accommodation at around €274, depending on options. For detailed prices and cancellation policies, click here and here (in German).
Concession rates may be available upon request for those with lower incomes. Contact Eivind to request this on:
eivind-rh@romskip.org
Reserve your spot!
We welcome participants of all genders. During the exercises, genders will be mixed, promoting an inclusive and diverse experience. Please note that this is not a dating event, but a space for personal growth and exploration.
This workshop is neither therapy nor a curative treatment. We encourage anyone with concerns about existing illnesses to consult with their doctor or therapist as well as asking us before participating.
Be prepared for a journey that may evoke intense sensations and uncomfortable realizations. If you prefer to avoid such experiences, this event is not suitable for you.
While we might not address every aspect mentioned in this event description directly, the retreat is designed to equip you with tools to tackle these challenges.
About the Trainers:
Anna Haas
I first heard of Radical Honesty in 2016, and just reading the name already set a lot in motion for me. I was simultaneously fascinated by the idea and totally scared of what could happen if I was more honest. It became clear to me how much I was holding back from what was going on inside me.
Over the past few years, I have learned to better perceive what I want and to ask for it directly, even if I expect a no. I no longer avoid all situations where I fear blushing, but I do what I feel like doing anyway, and so far, I have never actually sunk into the ground. I express anger and appreciation directly instead of making subtle hints or pretending that nothing is wrong. I feel more deeply connected to others without adapting myself as I often did before. I have talked to people from my past and resolved old unresolved issues. I have learned to distinguish between what I actually perceive and what I imagine, and sometimes I ask if the other person is actually thinking or feeling what I imagine.
And above all, I now consciously and creatively shape my life - both personally and professionally.
It is my great passion to accompany people in getting to know themselves better in all their complexity, to accept themselves, and to show themselves. And to discover and unfold their very individual resources in the process.
For this purpose, I offer workshops and individual coaching. I am a certified Radical Honesty trainer, Getting Real and Systemic Gestalt Coach and Pantarei Practitioner. I have trained with the School of Consent and am a trauma informed practitioner (NARM).
Eivind Liland
I changed from building propellant pumps for spaceships as a startup CEO to exploring human connection. Turns out, I believe feeling your body can take you to places even a rocket can't.
Based in the living experiment and cultural laboratory ZEGG close to Berlin, I’m on the Radical Honesty Trainer path since 2021, assisting workshops as a Trainer Candidate since 2023.
I’m currently in training to be a sex- and relationship therapist and Heilpraktiker für Psychotherapie (non-medical practitioner). The topics of attachment, cultural conditioning and the dynamics of non-monogamous and non traditional relationships, as well as loneliness, interest me in particular.
I try to be an empathetic and curious coach, aiming to support you in tracking your experiences from moment to moment, exploring the edge of your conscious awareness.
Fueled by deep curiosity and a love for experimentation, I prefer a constructive attitude to life, with the motto “love it, leave it or change it.”
Most of all, I am interested in the transformative possibilities that open up when we are vulnerable, connected, and true to ourselves.